Yesterday, my girl and I attended her two year well-baby check-up.
I had made us the first appointment of the day, so we could be in and out swiftly. But as we checked in, we were given a clipboard and a large questionnaire to fill in the waiting room.
After instructing the UrbanToddler not to touch anything, as that waiting room is a minefield for children, filled with all kinds of can't-keep-my-hands-off-of "stuff", fondled, drooled-on and chewed by kids with colds and flus, I actually looked around in vane to spot a less dangerous seat to fill the questionnaire in. And before you say it, let me tell you that you too would be a germaphobe if each and every month of this year, you were hosting a new unwanted guest in your home and in your family's respiratory area...
So, as I got going on the questionnaire, I found myself stomped on more questions than I care to admit. I imagined millions of mothers filling in this questionnaire with no problem at all, but all I wanted to do was to run to the receptionist and ask if this could be a take-home exam.
Q. Is your child Jumping ?
... hmmm... well, she does something resembling jumping , where she stretches her torso, throws her head back and shouts "Jump", with both feet planted on the ground. Does that count? Unsure?
Q. Is your child properly brushing her teeth?
Well, everyday we give her a toothbrush with some toothpaste on it. She puts the brush in her mouth and thirty seconds later she says "more toothpaste please". We then spend the next two minutes saying "you only get toothpaste once, now you should brush your teeth, like this..." Which she tries to imitate for one or two seconds. She then plays with the toothbrush in her mouth for twenty seconds, and then says "more toothpaste please"... where we repeat as above. After a few minutes she wants to rinse and spit, and then rinse and spit some more, and .... So, I guess the answer is Yes?
Q. Does your child let you properly brush her teeth?
NO!
Q. Does your child respond to two part commands, like Close the book and put it away?
If we say it slowly and give her a head start, like say "sweetie in a few minutes you need to close the book and put it away" and then repeat it again later, then Yes - usually...
Actually, she does much better with three part commands, like Please close the book, put it away, let's do something more fun.
Eventually, the multiple choice form (Yes, No, Unsure) was completed, with notes and asterisks, and many questions of my own, and we were finally invited inside to see our beloved Dr.
The visit went beautifully. The doctor took a quick look at the quiz and put it down with a smile, to my great relief. And my girl let the doctor weigh her, poke her belly, and look into her mouth and ears, with a brave, curious, and very cute face. I felt so proud of her I wanted to stand up and clap my hands (but for the sake of not embarrassing her I fought the urge)...
As the doctor got ready to leave she said "Everything looks great, your daughter is just lovely."
And then, with one leg out the door, she turned around with a smile and said "One more thing, if she isn't jumping , and by that I mean springing with two feet off the ground, in six months time, be sure to let me know".
And just like that two years of life was behind us, and our biggest concern was just getting her two feet off the ground... piece of cake!
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